This is a story where everything goes in reverse.

Yes, I owned one of those mansions once, about half the size of The Clampett Estate, but it had a similar floor plan, minus the cement pond. Well, those were the days I lived high on the hog, all things being relative, of course. Then one day the east wind blew, it blew and blew, and things changed and I started ‘A Movin on Down’. First a little further out into the suburbs into a smaller semi-detached home but still it was quite comfortable. Then tragedy hit again and I decided to try apartment living. First I purchased a condominium directly from the builder and since it would take at least two years to build, I decided to rent until I could move in. The apartment was quite spacious and it had a view to die for but it came with a price tag that I was willing to pay for just a few years until I could move into my own space in the sky.

My space in the sky turned out to be a shoebox compared to the rental but it’s in a beautiful neighborhood and a great location. Now I realize that even these expenses are a tad or two too much for me to pay every month on my income working in a temporary capacity and with a bleak outlook for employment. Will I never find a full time, permanent job? Yes, I will never.

So, now I’m thinking of 'Moving on Down' again. This time I’ll move into a less desirable part of the city and I’ll look for a house with a flat or perhaps something that I can rent out as a boarding house. I’ve realized that there are so many more like me out there heading for a shack in the woods but, before I take that step backwards, I’ll stay in the city and buy a 'Fixer Upper' but I don’t plan to ‘Fixer Up’. I can put up with the tacky wallpaper and leaking faucets and since most of those old homes have lead pipes it’s best to keep those faucets leaking. I’ll make sure every light bulb in the joint is fluorescent to do my part to help the environment. I’ll buy something on a very busy, major street, with a bus stop right in front of my door and no garage or driveway. If I go right into the inner city I’m sure I can find a townhouse within my budget, rent out the extra space and work for minimum wage, which is about what I earn now, and maybe, just maybe, I’ll get by.

When that becomes too expensive I’ll move to the woods into a trailer park or (and this is a good one) I’ll live on the lake in a houseboat until the weather gets too cold and the lake freezes over and then I can rent a motel room for the really cold months. I’ll keep my options open and consider living out of a van (it may come to that).

It may just get to the point where I CAN afford to rent that shack in woods and when that happens I’ll be Granny’s age and you can bet those great-grandkids of mine will strike oil and start that climb back up into civilization, again.

Sounds like a plan? What do you think?